Grandson of a Ghost explores how childhood experience resonates throughout a lifetime. It took a long time before I came to understand this — through the work with my psychotherapist — and the realization was profound.
My self-discovery became the impetus for writing the book, with the hope others could be inspired to begin their own exploration, to expose the repercussions of childhood trauma they may have shrugged off for decades.
I wrote a blog piece for Goodtherapy.org that explained my initial ambivalence to seeking therapy, and my motivation for writing the book:
One of the commenters to my piece shared a post from her own website. Her article stunned me with its relevance to my own discoveries:
Regarding traumatic childhood experiences, my eyes opened wide reading this excerpt: "...anything that feels like family betrayal can actually be worse, long term, than cataclysmic events. The theory is family betrayals, or betrayals by an intimate, go to your very core and make you feel unsafe."
Being aware of how the past impacts the present — and how the path to adulthood unfolded — can be instrumental to personal growth. The knowledge gleaned from its exploration becomes a tool to moderate and understand why certain events or social interactions elicit powerful reactions — like anxiety, hostility, or pulling away from people.
There's no shame in exploring and exposing hurtful events from the past. There may be pain, but it does less damage unearthed than buried. It's the way to move forward.